[Love Needs Sex and Blessing Series 328]Elderly people who desire hugging, touching and interaction need love and sex.

Transcript: Liang Yingxiu

(Kuala Lumpur News) Elderly people should let go of the familiar life patterns of the past, change their past behaviors and beliefs, let go of the aura of “thinking about the past”, break away from the pride of “being brave back then”, and reposition their life goals and lifestyle. In addition to being an adventure Journey requires courage to take the first step.

What happened to the lives of the elderly? In fact, we all pay attention to teenagers and children, but we often ignore the aging population.

Single elders need someone to accompany them

Sexology professor Lin Yanqing, who serves as an adjunct chair professor at the Institute of Human Psychology at Kaohsiung Shude University of Science and Technology in Taiwan, revealed that among the world’s 8 billion people, the aging population has actually become a time bomb and the biggest threat. Why do you say that?

“According to United Nations projections, in fact among the elderly population over 65 years old,

It will be 16% growth in 2050,

There will be twice as many children under the age of 5 in the world.

According to this data, the elderly population will actually surge in the future. “

“People have always been paying attention to the so-called elderly people’s health, such as diseases or physical care, so more and more long-term care institutions have been established, and these include some health drugs, food, and even what the elderly need. Whether it is crutches or diapers, there are many business opportunities for these, but so many businesses make me feel that the businesses only focus on the bodies of the elderly, but there is very little on their “sex”. Be noticed.”

When the elderly reach a certain age, most of their partners have already passed away. Therefore, generally speaking, these single elderly people are afraid of being alone and lonely, but they are also worried about whether they will become one of the unpopular people. , so they very much need someone to accompany them.

However, when the children grow up, they each have their own families. Although they are willing, they do not have the ability to accompany their parents at home. At this time, the elderly need more love and need to be loved, so this love is different from being loved. It’s on a psychological level.

“There is also a more important part that we ignore or often think is a myth, that is, we think that the elderly do not actually need sex. We even think that they are already old and only need to spend their old age well and should rest instead of Think of other things, like sex.”

Therefore, once an elderly person has a need and engages in sex transactions, they will be scolded as old and disrespectful if they are discovered.

Worried about junior discovering sexual needs

She pointed out that at this time, the old man’s actions were even more constrained. He became more secretive and worried that his juniors would discover that he also had sexual needs, which caused a shadow in his heart and made him unable to be happy.

“Let’s not forget that in fact, in addition to the sexual needs of the elderly, they really need to have these interactions, such as hugging, touching or kissing, it will be a good outlet, especially touching, the elderly like physical contact , touching him will make him feel like he was a baby or toddler again.”

“I once said in a long-term care institution that if you want to stabilize the elderly’s emotions, you need to give him some encouragement or rewards, just like in kindergarten, but what you give is not stickers or candy, but a physical relationship with him. Get in touch more.”

As for what kind of contact it was? Lin Yanqing said that if he only needs to take a bath once a day, then help him take one more bath. After the old man gets such a benefit, he will be very happy because he knows that he can be touched by others again today. It can be seen from this that , he really needs to be loved and touched.

Nowadays, there are more and more aging people, but not many people care about their current situation. Many people think that as people get older, they will become more knowledgeable and understand more than There are many young people.

“In fact, this is not necessarily the case. Although many people are older, their knowledge in a certain aspect is not necessarily as good as we imagined. In 2002, two scholars from China surveyed local men aged 60 to 70 Elderly people, 50% or half of them, think they already know about sex, but half of them still don’t know about sex! Among the elderly over 71 years old, the number of people who think they know about sex has dropped. , probably 41% understand it.”

How good your relationship affects sexual function

She used Taiwan as an example. She once conducted a survey on sexual knowledge among elders in the southern region, and found that only 51% answered correctly, so it was only half. What kind of knowledge would make the elders feel inadequate?

“In fact, it is the impact of sexual physiological changes and diseases on sexual behavior. For these elderly people, the knowledge in this area is the lowest. A scholar once conducted a study on “Intimate Relationships among the Elderly” and found that many people believe that the elderly’s The physical strength is not good, so it is not suitable for sexual intercourse; if you are an elderly person who still has a partner, you may also have this kind of thinking about their intimate relationship and attitude.

And what do the elders think about their sexual function? Lin Yanqing revealed that 64.7% of male elders and 61.3% of female elders feel that their sexual function is not bad, and 60% of this group of elderly people think that their sexual function is not bad. Now, it’s mainly because their relationship is very good; in other words, when their sexual function shows a bad proportion, it will get worse along with their relationship. It can be seen that whether the relationship is good or not really has a big impact on the sexual function of the elderly. influence.

open your mind to ideas

Women can also take the initiative

For the elderly, it is necessary to have their own private space, regardless of whether he/she lives in a long-term care institution or in his/her own home.

Especially for female elders, they are still bound by culture and suppressed by moral norms, and they believe that they cannot take the lead in sex.

Lin Yanqing pointed out that, therefore, we must get rid of this concept. The older we get, the more open our minds and ideas can be, letting ourselves know that we can take the initiative.

“Because for elder men, they have been playing an active role in sex from young to old. In fact, he looks forward to his partner more. If he takes the initiative, he will be ecstatic, so women can change this aspect.

Singles can use assistive devices to increase their fun

As for sexual aids, it’s okay to masturbate, but doing it by yourself will seem a bit boring and lack interest. Of course, if the elderly are still single, they can go to a sex toy store and buy some assistive devices such as massage sticks to help them achieve pleasure, but don’t feel embarrassed.

This is a very important breakthrough and change in concept. Of course, this kind of lifestyle still needs to be moderate. After all, your physical strength is not as good as before, so when you have desires, don’t force it first, but let nature take its course. Keep your mental and physical health in good condition, not to mention affecting your sleep and physical condition the next day.

“Especially don’t be afraid to feel depressed because you have high blood pressure. It would actually be better if we go with a familiar partner, because this feeling of relaxation can bring happiness to the mood.”

Don’t let physical limitations block your happiness

“The time can be extended because most of the elderly have retired at this time and have more time to have physical contact and caressing each other, which is also very important.”

Of course, when some women reach this age, it is inevitable that the vaginal wall will be dry, atrophic or thin, and the lubrication is not enough, but lubricants can help. When two people are in love, do not destroy or block the physical communication and the unity of spirit and body because of physical limitations. This is a very important piece of advice I give to elders of both sexes! I hope all the elders can be happy, safe and healthy.

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